Friendship gone, just like that!

The tennis had brought back some memories of a friend, who like me watched and cheered and yelled, especially when it was Andy Murray. We lived apart but emailed every day, more than once a day sometimes, for 20 years. And in Wimbledon we emailed 'yells' back and fro. But just before last Christmas she stopped communicating with me.

Something was said and I gave her an explanation, that implied she had the wrong end of the stick. And just like that she stopped, no explanation, just gave a message to someone else for me. There's no need to tell you, it caused me a lot of heart ache.

Why? I wanted an explanation, as to why, I wanted to know; I was chasing an explanation as though knowing why,  would lesson the pain I was feeling. If I could get her to explain herself, perhaps I'd feel better about it. But the truth is knowing why, wouldn't make it go away.

My lovely husband said at the time, let it go, there was no reason why she reacted as she did to me in particular, and it could have been anyone, and not me! It wasn't because I deserved it, not really because I caused it, not because I could have stopped it happening, once it had, that was it! Lesson learnt, when people step out of line, they don't want to be reminded that they have.. 

I've missed the daily banter especially now its tennis, but I've accepted now, that friendship has gone. But was it a true friendship, I think not, now that I've written about it. 

Would you drop a faithful friend of 20 years with no explanation? And as Dh said, she was no friend to behave like that!

Chrisxx

Tears and laughter!

 

A beautiful  photo from FB and it's calmed my mind because I've had an upsetting day.

Although I go to a hairdresser I take my own shampoo, Kerastase.  I buy it on line as you can't buy it in a shop.

Today I logged on, it did what firms that you use regularly do and it greeted me with 'Hello and my name.' 

I ordered my shampoo and as I started to fill in my name and address, a Bristol address flashed up. I changed it 3 times and paid.. went to check in my gmail to check it had gone through and yes it had, but with the Bristol address.. Grrrr I got back to the firm and yes I was speaking via chat to AI!!! So frustrating, you go round and round in circles. Anyway I've left it with them.. its not the £30,  it means I won't have the shampoo!

Dh was lovely about it, but what I can't understand why did another address come up? My details with them is my present address.

My eldest son phoned and the combination of lack of sleep and the wrong address I was a bit weepy, he said all the right things just like my lovely husband did and ended our conversation with..

'Nothing will matter in a couple of weeks Mum, when Andy Burnham gets in, because every body knows he's the messiah!' 

And I couldn't stop laughing!

Chrisxx

Living the Good Life??

I was very sad to hear that Penelope Keith has died, my children and I loved 'The Good Life' programme, and watched it regularly.

And as a 'newby' gardener I decided I'd try and grow some veg. I was given seeds by some friends and some compost, I didn't have any pots, but saved any food containers I thought suitable. That first year I grew some tomatoes, lettuce and radish. All grown on a window sill and planted out in our small garden. They grew but they weren't all that successful, except for the radish which my children didn't like, and neither did I! 

But my then husband ate them, although quite critical of the tomatoes (they had bottom end rot) and the lettuce were very small. 

But I didn't give up and got some gardening books from the library and read what I should have done, and the need for regular watering and the need for a 'feed.'

My then husband, to encourage me bought me some wellies for Christmas! I should have been more grateful. because they were a very good pair, bought from the Chandlers that sold all the sailing gear. I wasn't impressed and never wore them!

But even worse was his decision to grow veg, because of course he could do it better than me!

I did write about it in this blog somewhere. 

I got home from town one day, to find he had hired a rotovator and dug up my garden.. I didn't speak to him for days and in the May school holidays, I took the children and we came here to my home.. my aunt had sent me the train fare. I left a note on the kitchen table.

The garden was back to lawn and flower beds a couple of years later. He'd lost interest and the weeds grew!  

Then three or four years later, his work wasn't going to well, and he was having problems sleeping. He joined us to watch the 'Good Life' and thought we should move to a Scottish Island and live off the land I said NO!! I wouldn't even talk about it and stopped trying to grow veg, I never had enough money anyway for seeds anyway!

Why do we women live in a shadow life, controlled by a man.

The day I decided to leave was like a new life was waiting for me.. and its been amazing ever since.

Chrisxx

What a cheek!

 When my step counting watch went phut, Dh bought me a new one. It's an all Bells n Whistles one and logs all sorts of things as well as steps. Would you believe yesterday it said..'It looks like you took a nap at 4:03 for 1 hr 43mins..' So my every move or non move is being recorded!! It keeps telling me my sleep score is poor, logging when I wake! I need more sleep it says.. I know that, no need to tell me, just tell my bladder that!

But when my steps don't achieve my target I can read its frustration in its score.. so I'm tired and don't move enough? Well if I slept better I'd  be more active,, my virtual walk, this time in Barcelona is, 16.4km  behind my planned pace!

All around me there are prompts to exercise, there are TV adverts, FB adverts, health warnings of being over weight and the need to keep active.. But, as yet I have never seen an news item or charity request for funds for research into over active bladders in aging people. I've yet to meet a female over 75 plus who didn't have to get up for the toilet more than once at night.

And it occurs in males too, so why isn't there a research project into why there is this frequent need to empty your bl***y bladder?  Any answers? 

Chrisxx

Life goes on and too fast!

Our garden continues to produce in spite of this extraordinary heat and being SW facing it does get very hot.

The carrots are those little round Chantenay and we are eating rhubarb most weekends.

Our hedgehogs still visit every night, so do three different cats!

My antirrhinums do well every year although the seeds are slow to germinate, but they do eventually appear!

In these hot days we've taken the slow lane and not done an awful lot.  

Dh usually gets up before me and my first words to him even before 'Good morning' have been, 'Has it rained?'

But we haven't had these thunder storms with a down pouring of rain like some places... although our trail cam showed some spots the other night and amazingly you could see the patches of dry appearing when it stopped on the patio!

I love the summer but not this heat, we've not even sat out to eat any meals. 

And I hate that its nearly the end of June already, where did this month go to? The thought of wet and cold winter does not appeal to me at all!

Chrisxx

Bliss!

 The temperature has dropped to 22C today Friday, and it is bliss. We've had a walk around the garden and it has survived the blazing heat of the last couple of days. Our thermometer on our south west facing patio, registered 40C one afternoon. We are so glad we bought that portable AC unit three years ago, and it has been running full blast, plus fans. When I asked Dh was it using a lot of electricity, he said, 'We're using our heating allowance!'

I've just walked past our open bedroom door, and with the bed made up with fresh white bedding, it looks cool and inviting.. The nights have been hot and sticky even with a fan sweeping over us. I can't wait for bed time!! And I am starting a new Kristin Hannah book, bliss, bliss and double bliss!

The flower is a bare rooted plant I bought in the spring and I can't remember its name, but isn't it pretty.. such a delicate pink. 

Chrisxx

Very satisfying results.

 

What can be more satisfying to see, than those first few tomatoes grown from seed by yourself?

I sowed my seeds at the end of February, so we'd have the tomatoes early in June.. however  they were in one of our little plastic green houses outside and were drowned, when we had deluge of rain and we then discovered the plastic had disintegrated and the rain had poured in!

So I sowed more in early April and wow they grew into a good size plant in weeks.. and here they are forming fruits already!

Lesson learnt no point sowing seeds so early. I'm delighted,. And we have had our own carrots, potatoes, lettuce and we've had rhubarb every week.. so satisfying! Beans, cabbages and peas to come.. you don't need an allotment or even a large garden to grow your own, most of ours is grown in bags and pots..what do you grow?

Chrisxx

Hot and Sleepy.

Its a  hot quiet Sunday afternoon and because I was awake at 4 and couldn't get back to sleep, I went for a lie on the bed after dinner to read.. but my eyes kept closing, so I gave in and closed my eyes.  Actually they closed themselves and for two blissful hours I slept.

Amazingly, there's no drilling, banging, or even a dog barking, which is wonderful. We moved here to what we thought was a quiet cul-de-sac. five years ago this month.. and there has been building work on one house or another ever since!

But today silence reigns,.

This is the first rose I bought when we arrived here, 'Susan Daniels.'

We call it our 'Susan' rose and she has been doing us proud every year, Isn't she a beauty?

Chrisxx

To grunt or not to grunt???

The tennis season is right on us and we love watching it, we have to regulate how much we watch or we'd never get anything else done..We miss Andy Murray but now cheer some of the younger British players, who are working their way up to be the winning players.

Some people don't like the shouting or grunting noise a player makes as they hit the ball.. However there is a science behind the shouting during exertion, it seems that vocalization can enhance muscular force and performance for up to 9 to 12% ! This can be enough to add a meaningful amount of energy to a lift, or speed to a tennis serve, or power to a punch!

There has been lab tests measuring force with or without vocalization. In one classic experiment participants who shouted during an isometric arm flexion produced 12% more force than those who stayed silent.

A more recent study measuring striking force in martial  artists, found there was 9% more increase when participants grunted,  jumping from 22.g force to 22.2g force per strike.

In tennis the result is equally clear a study of players, with  both serve and forehand velocities were  significant higher when players grunted! The same was true for isometric force during those strokes. The statistical confidence was essentially perfect, meaning the result wasn't a fluke. 

Its all to do with taking in oxygen and using the diaphram and deep abdominal muscles force out the air and add extra force to the punch, stroke or speed. 

During my post op physio on my arm, the one physio always used to say, take some deep breaths, fill your body with extra oxygen to help you.. It's something I do all the time now if I have to do something that is going to take a bit more effort!

So cheer on our British tennis players and be glad when they grunt, because it means that little bright yellow ball is going to be the winning stroke... Come on Cam Norrie, come on  Emma Raducanu, come on Arthur Fery!!

Do you love watching tennis too?

Chrisxx

Love

 

Saw this and loved it, so showing it to you.

Chrisxx